WOMAN SAYS CELL PHONE SAVED HER FROM SINKHOLE

What?  I now know the most important ITEM to bring along is my IPHONE.  It can save me from sinkholes!  What kind of app is that?  Does it have a GPS system for the Earth's crust that sounds a deafening alert alarm along with the words, "DANGER, DANGER, SINKHOLE AHEAD, STEP LEFT!"  Phew, that was a close one.  Maybe it detects a drop in air pressure.  I know, it has a titanium antennae that stretches across the diameter of the hole for you to dangle from until help arrives.  Better yet, maybe it launches a grappling hook and when you press 9 it slowly winches you up, James Bond style.  How much would you pay for an app like that?  .99 cents?  4.99?  Come on. It SAVES lives.

So for all you naysayers that worry about my safety, no need... I have an iphone!

SHOES

I don't get the whole new shoe fashion.  Am I alone?  Shopping today I saw tons of some pretty high stilettos.  I looked at some and thought, that is cute, BUT could I walk in them?   I can't even imagine getting up off the chair after strapping them on? What would I do if I did get up?  Aerate the lawn?  Go for a drive? I'd be so far away from the gas peddle my knee would be up in my chest!

 Where have all the ballet flats gone?

What I Do To Increase My Savings ~

It is now 10:00 PM Friday.  I am finally winding down from the last few days of working my ass off to pad my savings.  All this to be able to enjoy this exhilarating adventure I want to embark on.  I want to do it right and from my experience, FUN costs!   Did you remember I am a middle school teacher by day? Well, I also work in the emergency room evenings. I was asked to fill in on wonderful St. Patty's last night 'til midnight.  The entire place smelled of corned beef, cabbage, and Guinness.  I agreed temporarily forgetting that I had to chaperon the middle school dance tonight, after teaching all day.  Salivating over  the 30 bucks I was promised, I arrived and instantly felt like I was back in 1970. The cafetorium filled with tie-dye and flip flop clad teens. The girls on one side with their freshly quaffed hair.  The boys on the other side, awkward and SHORT.  The music was the only thing different than my years in Jr. High, which is what middle school was called.  The LOUD constant beat of the base finally draws them into dance.  All except for the few future fast food workers, I lovingly refer to as "the 3FW's" running around trying to stomp on the balloons.  Just about the time the girls and boys dare to mingle, the DJ announces the last song. Guess what!  Still "Stairway to Heaven."  Couples start to dance, arms extended, hands shoulder to shoulder, except for that one daring horndog with his hands on his girls' ass.  They were all swaying, left and right, a foot apart, gazing, anywhere but at each other for 8:02 long teen minutes.

What I won't do for a buck!  

DAMN GIRL SCOUTS

I am trying to lose weight in anticipation of feeling healthier as well as other things I shall not mention here.  So working as a teacher during "girl scout cookie" season really is a challenge!  My inability to say no, which I believe may be a behavior learned early and continued into high school with the football team, I ended up with 6 boxes.  Leaving today, I gave away 4 boxes feeling good that I only had 2 boxes left.  Wait, before you congratulate me, let me point out that it was not a typing error when I wrote "had".  The shortening bread ones are bad enough but I, Jo, began dipping them into peanut butter.  I feel my arteries hardening (I think I hear them too)  It sort of sounds like a heavy metal bank vault slamming.

Oh well, tomorrow will be a better day, cookie free!

I LOVE IT WHEN THINGS WORK OUT!

Today has been one of those days when everything works out (except the kink in my upper neck)  First I have received so many offers for free lodging all over the place.  I think it must be my promise of blueberry pancake mix and syrup!  (see poll below) I received news that I will be receiving a tax refund this year, this will start my trip fund.  I also received advice as to posting the things I may need and people may have things to "lend".  Or maybe a certain someone, MICHAEL, will use it as a birthday, Christmas, Groundhog's Day gifts!  "hint hint"  Notice I didn't write anything about Valentine's Day.  There is only ONE think I want then.  Yep, that's right a huge, silky, ha...ha...heart shaped box of chocolates.

Mature people truths

Mature people truths

Friends and Family Input

After watching thousands of videos and reading millions of help pages I am ready for this blog to be more interactive.  I have created a spreadsheet in which I have listed all 50 states horizontally with headings of all the places I am interested in visiting along with color coded pins in a map. As you can see,  organization is my strength.

This is where you all come in.  If you'd like to follow my quest to travel the US and help me with places of interest, as well as people you know along the way that are willing meet me and to be interviewed, let me know!  Here is my master plan.  I will stop at comedy clubs to work on my "chops" in as many states as possible so I added that as a heading.  I have also added headings for people who want to meet me along the way, museums, attractions, historical places, oddities, the bizarre, musical concerts and festival, national parks, highways of note, local festivals, diners, etc.  If you would like to receive an email of each entry, pre-trip and/or during the trip, I intend to add photos, polls, videos, music, and hopefully a little bit of humor.

Please contact me if you would like to receive automatic updates by email.

I am having trouble receiving comments.  I have tried a new setting.  When you read this, please leave a comment so I can see that it works.

FRIDAY

Another fun filled week of teaching middle schoolers! A student took control of my photobooth, aren't we cute?  In case you didn't know I'm the one of the right!  I tried to look like I was having fun but I was actually being polite and thinking "10 minutes 'til miller time".

That got me thinking about one of those coolers you plug in your car to take on my roadtrip.  Do you think that is a bad idea?  Beer and driving?  Even if I have a GPS?

FEEDBACK

I've been getting quite a few comments about my "couch surfing" at strangers' homes.  I believe in Americans!  I look forward to meeting new people, and it gives me the in I'll need to investigate the "feel" of the town and film something "wacky".  Beside, Do you really think someone's going to ask me to their lair to seduce me? Or filet me for a new coat of old, yet soft, veiny skin?  Have you MET me?